Why I Dislike Sales, the Verb, not the Events

I really dislike sales. I don't mean those retail events where you can save a bunch of money because items are reduced in price, or are "on sale", but the verb sales, the concept of pushing or promoting a product or an idea.

I really dislike sales. I don't mean those retail events where you can save a bunch of money because items are reduced in price, or are "on sale", but the verb "sales", the concept of pushing or promoting a product or an idea. I know salespeople, for the most part, have a tough time of it what with all the competition. I suspect I'm a results oriented person in that if I make a business phone call, I expect some sort of result. I understand volume is the key to some sales positions, but I can't imagine making a hundred calls and getting no results, not even ten calls.

Had I wanted fries with that I would have asked for them

McDonald's used to have its counter people ask if you wanted fries if you didn't order them, or maybe an apple pie. But they didn't push; all you had to do was say no. Yet it was still annoying. I'm sure research shows that if you ask every customer if they want fries it leads to an increase in sales. But does research exist on the number of people turned off by the question?

Thanks, but I'm just looking

When I go into a store the ideal situation is to be greeted by a salesperson who offers assistance, but then leaves things up to me to get back to them when and if I need them. The Gap has this down pat, lots of pleasant helpful salespeople going about their jobs but not hovering. For God's don't hover around me, hiding behind racks of clothing lurking. By all means offer me things, but leave the tenacity at home.

Always be closing

Alec Baldwin in Glengary Glen Ross

In the great film Glengary Glen Ross the tough world of sales is dissected expertly. You should always be closing deals, life is sales, there are no days off, no friends, just potential closings. This is the sort of thing that sounds like the stereotypical insurance salesman that no one will invite to a party because all he wants to do is pitch his wares.

Go ahead then, pitch me

At least in retail sales there is a slight semblance of subterfuge. It's not as if the salesperson comes right out and says "Okay, I'm going to try to get you to buy a bunch of crap you didn't come in for and don't need". Even if that is their job. As soon as I sense someone is trying to sell me something, I don't want it anymore. For a time I worked promoting publicly traded companies to potential investors. On one occasion during an initial telephone call, the person said to me "Go ahead then, pitch me". I don't even like the word "pitch", so when this guy said that he may as well have said "Go ahead then, you tell me your bullshit, and I'll try not to be an idiot and believe it".

By all means present ideas to people in positions to help you out, but pitching ... no thanks.

Commission vs Salary

To me a job involving commission rings of mistrust on the part of the employer: we'll pay you for what you achieve, once you've achieved it.

Putting the shoe on the other foot for a moment, like many people I have found myself in job interviews when the concept of commission comes up. That usually brings the interview to an end. I understand that many salespeople like the system of receiving compensation based on performance - or commission. They see this as an opportunity to make more money; work harder and get more cash.

To me a job involving commission rings of mistrust on the part of the employer: we'll pay you for what you achieve, once you've achieved it. My preferred approach is that my resume, my experience, shows what I have achieved and what I am capable of, if you want me to do that for your company please show some confidence in me and pay me a commensurate salary. If I don't live up to expectations you can fire me. In the commission model the employee has to go first - sell first and you'll get paid after,  in the non-commission model the employer goes first - salary in keeping with experience.